anyway, watching a certain junior yesterday i felt for her. seriously. i saw myself in her and how while everybody was feeling LOVED (receiving enough flowers to open a florist shop) she was quietly slinking into the background, hoping not to be noticed or even to be seen alone. trying to create small talk and all which usually failed. she's really nice but i don't think she's cut out for ld. she has to be able to take all that x1000000 + people screaming at you for things that are not your fault + smiling even when someone just shoves you away + people taking you for granted. i've learnt to live with that. and i'm kinda amazed at the amount of shit i've tolerated. i'm glad it's all over now. and i think this experience has in a way made me stronger and even more set to fight for what i want. i'm not going to be a saikang warrier anymore. i'll have others do it for me.

anyway, i just realised I REALLY REALLY want to get out of here. like totally. i'm not kidding. i would even take up a teaching scholarship just so i can go overseas to study. and i told zoe that i actually want to go overseas to experience the 4 seasons. like REALLY. i want to. it's so freaking hot here at the Equator and it's so boring all year round. while we're slogging our guts out during the holidays our dear teacher is TOURING THE WORLD! can you imagine. mr white rocks! he's going to miss our ex-teacher's WEDDING because he'll be in Hokkaido. :( i want to go too!!!!